5 Ways to Better Understand Neurodivergent Communication and Behavior in the Classroom

Every educator has moments when a student shuts down in the middle of a lesson, reacts strongly to a change that seems small, or seems disengaged. It can seem like the student is trying to be defiant or oppositional, but they are actually communicating an unmet need.

For neurodivergent students, behavior is often the most direct way to show what they need, especially when traditional communication feels overwhelming or inaccessible. When educators adopt a neurodiversity-affirming approach to behavior management, it becomes easier to interpret behavior as a need to address rather than a problem that needs to be fixed. This shift in perspective benefits neurodivergent students while creating a more supportive learning environment for everyone. Here are five ways to better understand neurodivergent communication and behavior in the classroom.

Recognize That Behavior Is Communication

One of the most important mindset shifts is realizing that all behavior communicates something. A student is not usually late because they do not care, and they do not choose to stim in class to distract others. These behaviors are often attempts to cope or self-regulate.

For example:

• Arriving late or seeming disorganized may reflect executive functioning challenges, not laziness. Getting ready in the morning or switching between tasks can take significantly more effort for autistic students or students with ADHD than neurotypical students. 
• Audible stimming, like humming or tapping,  can help a student regulate in under-stimulating environments or stay focused and calm.
• Refusal to start work may stem from being overwhelmed by a large, unclear task.
• Walking around the classroom may indicate a need for movement to maintain focus.
• Covering ears or avoiding eye contact may be a way to manage sensory input, not a sign of disrespect.

When behavior is recognized as communication, students are not punished for expressing needs. Instead, educators can create supports that meet the students where they are.

Learn the Meaning of “Neurodiversity-Affirming”

Being a neurodiversity-affirming educator involves more than being kind. Neurodiversity-affirming practices respect neurological differences without treating them as deficits. Here’s what that looks like in practice:

• Use neurodiversity-affirming language. For example, instead of saying “low functioning student,” just say the support they need, such as “a student who communicates best through AAC.”
• Assume students want to do well. If they are not meeting expectations, understand that it is for a reason. Ask what barriers, like sensory overload or unclear instructions, might be in the way.
• Being flexible. For example, if a student is struggling with group work, allow them to take a short break or contribute in a different way.
• Encouraging students to celebrate their individuality rather than hide it.

This mindset shift ensures that students do not feel forced to mask or hide who they are. 

Understand Why Miscommunication Arises

Many classroom conflicts stem from mismatches in communication or processing styles. This is called the Double Empathy Problem, where both neurotypical and neurodivergent people misunderstand each other’s communication styles. Unfortunately, the responsibility is usually placed on the neurodivergent person to adjust. Recognizing the differences helps educators respond with understanding rather than discipline. For example:

• A student might “misbehave” when the classroom is too loud, bright, or crowded
• A student who procrastinates may actually be having difficulty breaking tasks into smaller steps
• A student who takes longer to respond might just need more time to process
• A student might hear you say “wrap it up” and not know that you mean “finish the assignment” due to differences in literal versus abstract thinking

Simple actions, like saying “I see this is hard right now, what would help?” often goes further than a consequence.

Reframe Behavior Through a Strengths-Based Lens

Another way to approach behavior through a neurodiversity-affirming lens is to reframe behaviors as indicators of strength and then help students use those strengths. For example:

• A student resisting schedule changes has a strong need for structure and predictability which could be valuable for planning projects and events.
• A student who asks lots of clarifying questions demonstrates self-advocacy.
• A student who withdraws in noisy environments is expressing self-awareness of sensory needs which is important for self-regulation.
  

By naming the underlying strengths, educators can shift the narrative from “problem behavior” to “developing skills,” which helps students, educators, and families feel more optimistic about progress.

Pair Understanding with Practical Supports

Compassion is important, but pairing it with practical supports is what makes a lasting difference. That might look like:

• Previewing schedule changes with a visual countdown or change card
• Breaking large assignments into smaller, labeled chunks. 
• Allowing movement breaks, noise-canceling headphones (or concert earplugs, which are cheaper), and access to fidgets for regulation.
• Offering sentence starters or AAC tools for communication
  
  

When students feel seen and supported, classrooms become safer and more productive spaces.

Addressing neurodivergent behavior begins with understanding the different ways students process and engage with the world. When the focus is on punishing noncompliance or promoting conformity, students are sent the message that who they are is “bad” and their needs remain unmet. By reframing challenges as communication, adopting a neurodiversity-affirming approach, and applying practical strategies, educators can create classrooms where every student feels understood.

Our Ava case studies show how this shift plays out in practice. In one classroom, a teacher saw significant improvements in behavior after introducing Ava. Students began applying self-regulation skills from the game directly in class, which reduced behavior incidents, meltdowns, and disengagement. Learn more about how Ava can support your students.

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