Conflict resolution for neurodivergent students
In this video, Deiera Bennett explains that conflict resolution with students, especially neurodivergent learners, is more effective when you slow down, prioritize regulation, separate participants, focus on observable facts, and collaboratively identify what’s needed to move forward rather than rushing to a quick fix.
Transcript
If you're a teacher or you work with kids, you know that they argue a lot. A student gets upset and there's a disagreement, and we sometimes go straight to talk it out or say sorry or give that back because the goal is just to fix it as quickly as possible, but that often backfires when you're working with neurodivergent students or neurodiverse groups. Conflict resolution cannot be rushed. So try this instead.
First, check their regulation. This is super important. Ask yourself, are they even calm enough to think and respond? If not, pause because you won't make any progress while emotions are high.
Next, separate the students instead of forcing interaction. This gives them space and time to calm down before addressing the issue. Then ask for the facts. This is really important. Tell them to focus on what someone could see or hear instead of making assumptions about motives or how the other person felt. So, for example, she was mean, is it a fact? But she laughed while I was reading, is a fact.
Then figure out what's needed to move forward. Do they need their item back? Are they working on a project and need clearer roles so that they don't overlap? Do they need space away from each other? These steps get to the root and then resolve the issue rather than putting a band-aid on it that will probably fall off by the end of the school day.
On our website, socialcipher.com, we actually have lots of conflict resolution lesson plans and different resources like posters that can help students practice these steps before a conflict even arises. Check them out at socialcipher.com.
Follow us @socialcipher on TikTok and YouTube for more educator-focused videos about neurodivergence!
Key Takeaways
- Attempting conflict resolution before students are regulated is counterproductive. The first step is to check whether students are calm enough to engage.
- Separating students and asking them to focus on observable facts rather than assumptions about motives helps prevent escalation and gets to the root of what actually happened.
- Effective conflict resolution with neurodivergent students ends by identifying a concrete, actionable next step rather than a generic apology, which is more likely to prevent the same issue from recurring.
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